Uncomfortable. Your chest tightens every time they send you a text. You laugh a lot more than you used to, but it feels rehearsed. You question whether the weight of love should feel like this: tense, exhausting, confusing. You may already know that this is the beginning of toxic relationship feelings.

Realizing these signs in the early stages could be the difference between potential years of emotional pain and reclaiming your life. Whether you are knee-deep in it or just inquiring about the tone of your relationship, this blog is intended to shed light on the red flags before they become commonplace.

1. You're Always Walking on Eggshells

If you are constantly adjusting your words, actions, or feelings to avoid provoking your partner's anger or mood swings, you are not sensitive; you are surviving. 

Healthy relationships operate on communication, not fear-based silence. Being uncertain about what version of your partner you will get today is a significant early warning sign.

2. They Twist Your Words or Feelings

Toxic partners are exceptional manipulators. They may deny things that they said, invalidate your feelings or reactions, or tell you that you are "too sensitive." It is called gaslighting, but over time, it causes you to distrust yourself. You start to doubt your memory, your feelings, and even your reality. 

If you are constantly questioning yourself, ask yourself: Am I the one overreacting, or are they the ones being under-accountable?

3. Isolation Comes Wrapped in Love

Toxic behaviour will often disguise itself in the beginning stages. Maybe they'll say, "Your friends just don't get us," or "I just want you to myself". At first, that may feel flattering, but eventually, you are severed from, at least, that support system. 

Toxic partners isolate you not because they want to be in control but rather because they have the power of emotional manipulation, sometimes even guilt.

4. Boundaries Are Ignored or Punished

Suppose they're reading your texts and other messages without your consent, teasing you for needing space, or simply asking about your money any time that your emotional, physical, or digital boundaries are crossed. In that case, that's control, not love. 

Your boundaries are where your power resides. If you're in a toxic relationship, they're usually the first thing to be attacked.

5. It Feels Like a Constant Power Struggle

Healthy love is about balance. Yet if you feel like you're the one who is always outvoted on choices, finances, social events, or even your aspirations, you're not part of an equal partnership. Toxic relationships rely on control disguised as caring. 

Ask yourself: Are my needs actually being listened to or just tolerated?

6. You Don't Recognize Yourself Anymore

Losing your sense of self is one of the most painful signs of toxicity. Perhaps you are no longer doing things you enjoy. Maybe you are losing confidence. You could even feel like a shadow of who you used to be -mentally spent, spiritually lost.

But it is important to remember that you are still there. And you deserve to be your true self again.

7. Apologies Without Action Are Just Empty Words

In toxic dynamics, we see one altercation followed by a dramatic apology. Tears. Gifts. Promises for change. But then the same cycle repeats. In the absence of enduring behavioural change, apologies become a strategy of manipulation! 

Genuine remorse leads to real growth. Don't fall for sweet-sounding words and sour old behaviours.

8. Intimidation Even Once Is a Dealbreaker

If your partner has ever raised their hand, thrown something out of anger, or made you feel unsafe physically, take that seriously. No amount of abuse is too little for you to acknowledge. The intimidation or coercion that first began is often only the beginning of something much worse.

You do not need to wait for it to get worse. You have every right to walk away now.

9. You Feel More Drained Than Nourished

Love should lift you, not drain you emotionally. If you feel like your time with your partner is more emotional labour than emotional safety, you need to pay attention. You deserve a relationship that feels like peace, not performance.

10. Your Gut Has Been Whispering All Along

Although you may have been quieting your inner voice for months or years, it never left. That uncomfortable feeling, that little bit of anxiousness, is your intuition saying, "hey! listen up!"

Kanchan Bhaskar, survivor, coach, and advocate for women finding their voice and power, said:  "When I ceased to justify their behavior and instead trusted my inner voice, I found my way out. And you can too."

Reclaim Your Life

If you found this blog relatable to your life, it's no accident; this is your moment of truth. You are not alone. You are not overreacting. And most importantly, you are not broken.

Kanchan Bhaskar, a dedicated life coach for women, helps individuals across the globe through transformational coaching. Her mission is to help women reclaim their voice, confidence, and emotional and financial independence after toxic or abusive relationships.